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  Dezerai

I Am Powerful

2/26/2018

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When you think of someone powerful, who do you think of? Is it a politician, a CEO, a Pastor, a teacher? What makes them powerful? Is it their position, their leadership skills, their ethics, their wealth, their influence?

The Bible is filled with stories of incredibly powerful women; both those who lead from the front and those in the background. The Bible bears testimony of women who served God wholeheartedly and took risks that you and I would never dare to attempt. But of all the wonderful girl-power stories in the Bible, Deborah’s stands out to me. Perhaps it’s what missing in her story that makes it so interesting...prior to her appearance in Judges 4, there is no mention of her. We do not know where she came from or how she became the ruler of Israel at the time. While there may have been other women rulers, she is the only one recorded in the Bible, and she was recorded for good reason. This incredible prophetess brought an end to years of oppression and created 40 years of peace for her people!

If you haven't read the story, make it a priority. In my mind Deborah embraces everything I believe a powerful leader should be...in fact, she sets aside her "power" for the power of God. She does nothing without prayer, seeking the face of God and listening. She understood that being powerful doesn't have anything to do with a skill set, training, or wealth. Power comes through humility. Power is being a vessel through which God can move in your life, in your circumstances, and in those around you. Apart from him you can do nothing (John 15:5).

But how did she get there? Here’s what we do know:
Throughout her story, Deborah sought God’s voice and was obedient to do and say the things he told her to. She was confident in what she heard him say and was confident in speaking it out. Would you like to live your life with that kind of confidence? I know I would. So how can we become like Deborah? How can we become women who hear God’s voice clearly and respond in obedience confidently? We must spend time in preparation. It is essential to set aside uninterrupted prayer and conversation time with God. The scripture tells us Deborah went up from her tent to the Palm of Deborah where she ruled. “She WENT” from her place of preparation to the place where she ruled. This is the key to being a woman of God, to being a woman filled with grace, confidence, and power; it’s the time you spend in preparation with the Lord before you go and rule.

Like many of you, I spend a lot of time “doing,” always busy, always excited about what’s next, begging God to tell me what he wants me to do next. Often times I’m so busy actually doing that I don’t take time to prepare. But God won’t give me the “next” thing until I have allowed him to prepare me for it. And preparing to fulfill his will requires spending time with him. How can we fulfill the call of God in our lives if we fail to spend time with the one who calls? If you want to be powerful, spend time at the feet of Jesus, communing with the one who empowers you.

You can follow along with the #iamchallenge on
Facebook: @dezeraispeaks
Instagram: @dezerai
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I Am Gifted

2/17/2018

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Have you ever known someone who worked as a waitress? How about someone who worked as a music store clerk? What about a secretary, a security guard, or on a political PR team? Maybe a massage therapist, a speech teacher, a marketing associate, a vineyard worker, a tea house manager, or an entrepreneur? You can probably think of someone who has worked in one of these roles, but what about someone who has worked in all of them? Sound crazy?! Well, it’s not, because it’s me! I’ve worked in all of these roles and more!! I started my first part time job in a music store at the age of 15. My parents wanted me to develop a good work ethic and understand the importance of financial responsibility. I’ve worn a lot of hats over the years, some I loved and some I wasn’t so fond of. Each time I left a job, I was certain that the next one I tried would be the one I loved for the rest of my life…and every time, I was wrong.  While some of these jobs played well into my natural abilities, none of them fully fulfilled the gift I was born with.

I discovered my love of and ease of public speaking at the ripe old age of 6 when I was cast as the Velveteen Rabbit in our local children’s theater play. I can still remember the feel of the cold, itchy pink paint on my nose. On my hands and knees (I was a bunny after all) sitting on that stage, a fire was lit in my soul. From that day on, that soul-fulfilling fire was only lit when I was on a stage in front of a crowd. In college, my passion for performing took me into public speaking and collegiate debate. Every time I stood to speak, my heart lit up and my soul knew THIS is what I was created for. Do you know what that feels like? What it feels like when you live in your gift? The crazy part is that even after all the years of feeling that fire, I somehow convinced myself that speaking wasn’t really a gift. That I wasn’t a good “enough” speaker, that I didn’t have “enough” education and that no one would care about what I spoke on.

That is the enemy’s way – to bring doubt, fear, and uncertainty into our gifts. He loves to make us question the value of our giftings, because we are most powerful when we are operating in our God designed gifts!

God in his infinite mercy and grace allowed me to explore other gifts only to continue bringing me back to what I was created for. I shared in an earlier blog post that God has really spoken to me the past couple of years about “enoughness”- the fact that He created me as enough to fulfill his every purpose in me. My gift to speak and write isn’t just something that I happen to be good at and therefore should use for his glory; I was created with these gifts on purpose! So I decided to stop turning my back on this gift. I stopped searching for a “better” gift and my soul has never felt more content. What about you? Are you living in your gift or are you searching for a “better” one?
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You can follow along with the #iamchallenge on
Facebook: @dezeraispeaks
Instagram: @dezerai
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I Am Divine

2/12/2018

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Do you like a good story? I sure do. As a child I would stay up late at night in my bed with a flashlight desperate to read just one more chapter before my heavy eyes betrayed me into sleep. As an adult, I will admit I am no different. While my husband happily slumbers beside me, I turn page after page willing myself to stay awake so I can find out what happens next. A good story takes us on a journey. That journey must have ups and downs and unexpected twists and turns before the heroine can fulfill her purpose or discover a new part of her story.

Do you know that you’re part of a story? A story that has been unfolding for thousands of years! The most amazing thing is that the author knew your part of the story from the first day He began writing. You were purposefully created (“created in advance”) for these chapters of the book and NO ONE else is suited to fulfill your role. Although you are but one character in a HUGE story, the story would be incomplete without you! You are in the story for a PURPOSE and it is a GOOD purpose (Eph 2:10).

But what if we’re not living the story in the way we were created to? Can you be living your story one way and then decide to live it another? Absolutely! We’ve seen this happen - A drug addict who gets clean and starts a family, a criminal who turns their life over to Christ and becomes an evangelist, a victim of abuse who is healed and walking in victory!  No matter how you are currently living your story, the author has the best and most perfect version written for you, you just need to choose to step into it.

Does it give you comfort to know that the author has already written your part in the story from beginning to end? It certainly gives me comfort. All we need to do is move through our story as the author instructs. There is a lot of stressed relieved when you realize you don’t have to make decisions alone. The author of your story will tell you what to do next if you will simply seek his direction. At any point, you can choose to come back into alignment with the author. You can begin living your story as it was written to be lived – as divine.
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You can follow along with the #iamchallenge on
Facebook: @dezeraispeaks
Instagram: @dezerai

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I Am Fierce

2/6/2018

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Do you ever find your thoughts spinning out of control? Worries about what will be, or what has already been? I certainly have. At one point in my life, I let my thoughts get so out of control that I spun myself into deep anxiety and depression. My fear of not being perfect left me paralyzed to make any decisions & I wanted nothing more than to take back control and regain my sanity. Praise God I was able to, but it was a process involving 2 years of therapy, medication, and time with the Lord.

My journey of healing put so many things into perspective for me. One of the most important things I learned is that I’m NOT in control – and that’s ok, because I have the Holy Spirit inside me and he IS in control. John 16:13 says “But when he, the Spirit of Truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears;” and what he hears is the voice of our father in heaven. It brings me so much comfort to know that the father of heaven is speaking directly into my spirit to guide and move me into things that are true. But it is only when I let go and trust Him to lead me that I am moved from the lies in my head to the truths of who I am.

The Holy Spirit inside of us empowers us to be bold, empowers us to love and empowers us to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ! (2 Cor. 10:5). We must learn to let go of control and allow the spirit to take control. Whenever I’m feeling anxious now, I quote this 2 Timothy verse to myself over and over in my head until I feel myself relax and regain a “sound-mind.” This verse is worth memorizing and wielding as a sword when your thoughts & worries begin to run away with you. When your mind is sound, there is peace. When your mind is sound, decisions become clear. When your mind is sound, you are a powerful force against the kingdom of darkness.

We all face times in our lives when we are physically, emotionally, and mentally weak. In those times, when we have NOTHING of power, the truths of God become our life force. There have been times that I have felt so weak and so out of control that all I could do was drop to my knees and speak scripture over myself. “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow.” It is quite literally the ONLY thing that can cut through the fog, the muck, the despair, and the pain. Even if you feel like all of your armor has been stripped away, you are NEVER without your sword. But you MUST wield it. You must SPEAK! The bible promises that the Word of God will NEVER return void! (Isaiah 55:11)

We can try and struggle to do it on our own, but we will ultimately fail until we realize that apart from Him we can do nothing (John 15:5). With the Holy Spirit inside of you, you can face this week with power, love, and a sound-mind.
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You can follow along with the #iamchallenge on
Facebook: @dezeraispeaks
Instagram: @dezerai

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    Hi! I'm Dezerai, a woman passionate about living in my purpose, about creating a life on purpose and about challenging you to do the same. I speak, I write, and I hang out with my husky and my handsome husband in the beautiful Napa Valley.

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